hobbies... get one or be unhappy. hobbies are very important in keeping one in pleasant spirits. they distract your thoughts as well as giving you feelings of accomplishment. do not underestimate their power. from personal experience i can attest to their all encompassing influence on mood. please... i beg of you... get a hobby... it is for your own good.

why has rudeness gotten so bad? it is because we are too populous and do not feel part of the same group as the people we come in contact with. it is our legacy to be distrustful of strangers. it is even our legacy to be homicidal towards them. if you didn't kill them then they killed you and wiped you out.

the people we drive on the road with are enemies unless proven otherwise. we do not live in small enough towns to feel connected to people anymore. if we lived in small towns (sub 300 people), then we would know everyone and we would all feel a bond. the legal system would not even come into play because problems would be community problems. everyone would have a stake in conflict resolution. the legal system came more into play when stranger-to-stranger conflicts arose.

we are a big unmanageable mess. the only solution for that is to break up into small manageable chunks. towns have gotten way too big. they need to be broken up into smaller independent units. the entire group needs a say in how they are run. they will then have a stake in things and feel more responsible.

the idea of one big group is not working and cannot work because as we see it is impossible and unwieldy to manage. people slip through the cracks. a small independent group can catch said people.

hello, i am a human being. i enjoy making other humans laugh and smile. i also like to inform people of various informative tidbits.

my hobbies include petting cats, some light landscaping projects, computer programming, reading slashdot, watching socially aware primetime cartoons and foodTV, and learning about humans.

my ambition is to lead a stress-free life around humans that accept me and enjoy my company.

my dislikes include people wrapped up with appearances, hooligans, celebrity and celebrities, close-minded people, stubbornness, and people who think that an unsubstantiated opinion is just as valid as one based in logic and reason and direct observation.

my dream date would consist of me and my date debating an issue and coming to an agreement based on both our arguments, writing and debugging an application together, eating dinner, and then watching futurama and a taped episode of south park.

i prefer humans that don't smoke, drink alcohol, do drugs, wear makeup, style hair, or dress stylish.

i do prefer humans that are real, thoughtful, empathetic, funny, intelligent, and hell bent on world domination (just kidding on the last one).

if all this interests you then maybe our ships should cross paths (not in terms of collision but more in terms of a meeting and mutual exploration). give me a jingle and i'll provide a reach around. oh, umm, i mean give me a call and we'll see what type of chemical reaction ensues.

asian eyelids:

there is a plastic surgery procedure to add a crease to the single eyelid that is typical in many asian people to create a double eyelid similar to what most non-asians have. it is actually kind of popular. and some people use non-surgical methods to create the "western" eye fold look. asian eyelid skin is thicker and has more fat and this is a reason there is no fold.

this is different from the epicanthic fold which is "a prolongation of a fold of the skin of the upper eyelid over the inner angle of the eye". the epicanthic fold is what makes the asian eyes look like they slant upwards. there is surgery to remove this too.

one explanation for the different eyelids is that "narrow eyes of asians are better suited for survival in windy, flat environments (like central-asian deserts or tundra)".

just to note, i do not support this surgery and i also think it is demented. i think people should not alter their natural appearances. i was just researching asian eyelids and came upon this info. again, this is for information purposes only. i do not support plastic surgery or altering one's natural appearance.

if you read my take on the demise of classical music and whether today's music is an evolution of it or a cousin then this will make more sense. i think modern art and classical art followed the same trend. classical art, like classical music was commissioned by the wealthy. the artist could then devote a portion of his life to creating a requested art piece. today's art is more a work of the artist himself. it is whatever he wants and not what a cultured, elite, wealthy person told him to create. there are less fancy looking polished art pieces because the demand is no longer there. cultured rich people are no longer commissioning them. how and why could and would a starving artist build a twelve foot perfect statue of a roman goddess? he hasn't the money or the burning desire to do so. so now all we have for art is globs of paint flicked on a canvas. and so there you go.

i think it is sad that there is no place to live without someone's rule or government controlling you. and before you tell me Antarctica, i mean any habitable place with enough natural resources to sustain yourself. it is even anti-human that such vast expanses don't exist. we are made to spread out and migrate and explore. that is why we now occupy the entire planet. but what our ancestors had is no more.

there is no place to go anymore if we don't like how things are around us. we used to be able to go settle some new area and start fresh with our own rules and way of life. land and resources were freely available. but now we are stuck right where we are if we don't like it. we are imprisoned by the governments of the world. no longer are we free as individuals to live how we want. some government somewhere will have you under their rule. it will involve you in wars you don't want, environmental destruction you don't want, wasted resources you don't want, oppression you don't want, etc. if you don't want to be a part of it then too bad. government is watching.

these artificial borders that governments draw on maps are ridiculous. what right do they have to a particular tree, rock, or river. by right of force? is that where you want to live and raise children? inside an artificial border created because your government is better at killing than another's? that is certainly why the u.s.'s borders are drawn where they are. our government was better at killing than that of the native people's.

we like to forget that we have our borders because of our murdering abilities. but does forgetting that we murdered make it any more right? maybe something built on blood should not be allowed to continue. maybe we shouldn't support something built on the murder and oppression of others. slavery built the u.s. economy and allowed it to become the superpower it is today. where is the accountability for it all? gee, murder, oppression, and slavery were the very foundation for the existence of the united states but that's okay because most of us forget or don't know. try using that excuse in the u.s. legal system and you will see that even they would condemn the u.s. and don't let me leave out every other government of the world. you all know what you did. wars were rampant all through-out time and you know very well that slavery, oppression, and murder is why you are around as well.

you people sit idly back while your government acts on your behave doing as it pleases. built on deceit, oppression, slavery, and murder no wonder your government does what it does. even your religious teachings would condemn such a foundation. an empire built on evil won't last. the planet belongs to no one and was intended to be shared by all. upset the balance and the heavy ended scale will come smashing to the ground.

K.I.S.S (Keep It Simple Stupid):

there is at least one principle you should be applying to everything you do in your life. this principle is k.i.s.s. if you notice a solution to a problem become a convoluted mess then you know that it is the wrong solution. simplicity is elegance.

your relationship is getting all complicated? then you are doing it wrong. the java code you just wrote looks like a mess and is hard to follow? you did it wrong. your life in general is stressful and a mess? you are doing it wrong.

find the elegant solution to your problem and don't settle for a quick hack. a quick fix will only lead to another patch and then another. pretty soon your dam will be all patch material and no stone. start from the beginning with a simple, elegant solution. take time to plan before any labor is done.

bad mood tonight. not my fault like usual though. muther f'ers. damn if you humans don't upset me with your drama. i try to live the simplest, stress-free life i can but you damn dirty apes want to come at me with your drama. stop it!! save it for the stage. damn yo!

how hard do you think i have worked to shape my surroundings into a nice pleasant atmosphere? damn hard be-ATCH. who the f' but a damn dirty ape would want to disturb such a nice peaceful atmosphere? killers, war mongerers, rapists, thieves, liars a.k.a humans... destroyers of everything pure and simple.

can't we all jus' get along? is it too much to ask to let sleeping dogs lie? leave a peaceful place peaceful. stop mucking it up with your wanton and fried rice destruction.

okay deep breath. i really need to go back to watching tv all the time. i need something to numb the pain. i don't think i can go back though. tv mainly irritates me now. heh okay here are some shows i'll watch. don't think less of me though because you think they are lame. one is "the people's court". i like the judge on it and i used to watch the original many years ago when i was younger. it is really informative too. i watch a variety of shows from Food TV when i am in the kitchen but not regularly. some are "Ultimate Kitchens", "The Best Of", "Food 911", "Good Eats", "Molto Mario", and i used to watch "Iron Chef". I'll watch "Saturday Night Live" reruns on Comedy Central and also on that channel, "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart". and on sundays i'll watch "Futurama" and "King of the Hill" and sometimes the "Simpsons" but it has been mostly repeats. oh and speaking of cartoons i also watch "South Park". i gave up on weekday primetime major network shows long ago. suuuuck. i do watch "Survivor" though and have seen "Fear Factor" a bunch of times. i also stopped watching mtv for the most part. well that's about it. notice that they are low stress shows that i watch.

k' i am off to go paint. on the computer that is. real paint with no undo button is too stressful. i use a tablet and stylus and have no mess to clean up. later all.

most people seem to be involved in a bit of drama. and like the drill sergeant says, "save the drama for your mamma". life can be as simple as waking up, gathering food, eating, pooing, and sleeping. all the drama in between is nonsense. we grow up with it and perform it just as if on a stage. we respond to other's lines like it was written for us. he said this... she said that... blah... blah... is all nonsense. one should strive to cut this out. do not accept other people's drama and create none of your own.

ask yourself this... what are you doing to increase your happiness? don't ever expect it to be thrown in your lap. i spent a lot of time and effort learning about people and happiness. i learned about human relationships, our animal origins and how that effects us, dealing with stress, what love is all about, etc. i studied myself and others and read and watched. i was a bit disappointed in what i found out in some areas but that is because like everyone else i was taught that magic is real and happiness and a good life are ours for the taking. but now the puzzle pieces fit. it makes sense. having things make sense is important and it will keep you from feeling lost. but don't expect it all to magically become clear... magic is not real. seek the answers out.

Guilty. For the crimes against humanity and the world at large, you the Human Race are charged with wanton destruction, theft, and murder. You have been an active participant in the destruction of a planet of which you do not own. You have stolen every habitable inch of said planet. You have murdered countless numbers of fellow humans and other life forms. Your acts are especially egregious due to the sheer quantity of violations and your wholly and complete consent in committing said acts. On behalf of the world at large and the life forms contained herein and by rule of your own law, you the Human Race are sentenced to death by hanging till you are dead.

yes doing the lord's work. that's what i should be doing. spreading kindness and care and teaching the ignorant. it is a good feeling to be nice to people and it brings a sense of connection and belonging. it is just too bad that people like to pray on other's kindness. well if we just resolved to not do that and to accept kindness graciously it'd work.

we take for granted the contributions of the elite class throughout history. it is really what made us different from the other animals. i am not saying it is a "good" thing but it is what it is. who else would come up with ways of behaving that are totally opposite our natural animal instincts. who else would come up with the notion of suppressing our urges to kill and have sex? no one but the elite who have time to think these odd rules of behavior up.

why else did we live as hunter-gatherers for 100,000 years with little change in how we lived and behaved? we acted like the animals we were. we killed and sexed whenever we wanted. it is only in the last 10,000 years when farming came about and then the rise of an elite class. our behavior and way of life so drastically change from then on. with farming came food surpluses. with extra food came opportunity for specialized jobs. with specialized jobs came management and rulers and specialized soldiers. the elite were born.

the elite needed to control the people below them and set about to create rules and laws to do so. they also saw themselves as better than the common folk. this superiority led them to think that they should behave in a superior manner to the commoners. they then even came up with rules for themselves. they would not act like the inferior commoners. and now today we have all these rules of behavior that are so unlike our natural instincts.

if classical music was the music of choice a couple hundred years ago then are you going to tell me that distorted guitar sounds and bad singing is a step up in the evolutionary scale of music? what happened?

classical music was made for the elite and not for the general population. there were no radios or cds so the only people who could afford to see a few dozen musicians playing expensive instruments in fancy halls would have been the wealthy elite. the general population probably danced to the sounds of a lute, a mandolin, and a tavern drunkard.

today we no longer have that wealthy royal aristocracy. people of breeding and class were first replaced by once poor people who later became wealthy businessmen. today they are replaced by people that made it rich through singing or acting. their tastes are just as common as they are. this de-evolution in the class system is why classical music may have de-evolved into guitar rock. with no foundation to support it, the expensive hobby of classical style music was no more. the new elites were not raised on this music and so quite logically did not favor it and did not support it.

even if the arts had been supported as vigorously as in the past and classical music evolved into something better we still might have guitar rock and bad singing. like i said, classical music was for the elite. the general population had it's own parallel evolution of music happening. the mandolin became a guitar and tavern drunk became a lead singer. so quite possibly there is no relation between classical music and guitar rock.

now don't get me wrong, i'm as common as the next human. i'm just trying to figure out what happened to classical music and why it died out and why in god's name it was replaced by the rolling stones and n'sync. either today's music is an evolutionary step up from classical music or else classical music died out for some reason. my guess is that today's music is not related to classical and that it stemmed from the music of the common folk. i also think that classical died when the pure bred elites that sponsored art were replaced by the common rich businessmen who were not raised to be art lovers.

i also write this because i want to help. i know another me is out there. out of the millions of other people on the internet there is bound to be similar people to me. if you are not that similar to me and gain some insight by reading then that is nice too. but it is that other me that i really want to reach. call it a self-centeredness. i have fantasized about going back in time to help the younger me and to be the faithful friend i never had and to be my own guide and mentor. the next best thing i suppose is to help a similar me. i feel sorry for my younger self and so i feel touched when i see pain in people that is similar to my own. my wish would be to make their pain disappear and in doing that i help that younger me that's also trapped in a horrible world of pain.

and from sadness to anger...
if only you humans were not so human. you damn dirty apes.

i really do like you. you are a warm ray of sunshine upon my face on a breezy summer afternoon. you are that sweet taste of country fresh lemonade that dances down my throat on first sip. it really is a love affair i have with you. a torrent stream of emotion binds us as one. and the shape of your upright, bipedal form draws my eyes to gaze upon your beauty. i find your relative hairlessness pleasing. although not as soft as a kitten, your bare skin is pleasing to the touch. and that melodic tone that emanates from between your lips is captivating. as if in a trance i could listen for eternity to every utterance that you speak unto me. take my hand and i shall take yours. together forever our hearts become one. will you be mine? for i shall be yours. in a bond of love our souls entwine. and with them so does our flesh....

oh humans, i do long for your acceptance. we are a social breed. loneliness does not befit us. do you think you can forgive me? i mean all those horrible things i've said about you? like and addict to his addiction i crawl to you begging for more. let me in and let me show you the human i was born to be. let me show you the human that i have become. let me prove to you that i am worthy of your love. give me that chance.

come on you blind muther f'ers. wake up! open your freakin eyes and take a look at what's going on around you. look at yourself for heck's sake. do i have to get semi-profane for you to even take notice? everything will explain itself if you only paid attention. there would be no more confusion in your life. imagine everything clear as day. just stop and pay attention to the things around you. you will see the patterns. you will see just how simply everything works. you will see all those things that people do that adds artificial complication to everything. you will see how to stop doing that in your own life. just open your eyes!! pay attention!! take everything as a lesson. realize how similar we all are and how you can use that similarity to learn from others mistakes.

you should not be reliving everything that everyone before you already lived. start from their foundation and build higher. learn in a day what took them a lifetime. learn their lessons through simple observation. they made all the mistakes and paid for them and now you can learn them too but without having to waste your time actually living them out. learn their history and learn their story and you will know all you need to know to start building on top of that foundation.

and in conclusion, open your damn eyes and pay attention to what's going on.

with all my humans suck this and my humans suck that you may get the impression that i think myself somewhat beyond human. even somewhat superior. this was of course true at some point. it was probably more true when i was a rejected teen seeking to lash out at my rejectors with the logical step of believing myself superior. i needed some way to gain some self-worth since there was none coming in from anyone. so the only thing to do is to imagine yourself superior to those that reject you. i performed above the average academically which only served to support my claim.

but the thing about loneliness is that it gives you time to think. and think i did. i then got to the point where i really did know a lot more than the normal person. i knew i did and so more superior i would logically feel.

and now i have even come to the realization with proof that they were wrong. that they are the ones that were messed up. and now do you think i feel even more superior? nah. i know i am a dirty little perverted ape like the rest of you. i learned my heritage and it put me back to the bottom with the rest of the damn dirty apes.

i, like the rest of you, was taught that humans were a superior species. i learned the truth about us and it changed things. it makes me have no respect for you. you can't respect someone once it turns out that everything they told you was a lie. i don't like where you came from and i don't like what you've done with you lives. and what's worse is that you tried to cover it all up. i learned what you did though and it sickens me. i can't tell you the sadness i felt when the information started pouring in. it was unbearable and i still haven't recovered.

the funny thing is that you made me to hate you. you conditioned me to be idealistic and to expect more from humans and to think them the cream of the evolutionary crop. you invented the fairy tale about yourself. if you had only been honest and told me that you were nothing but a violent, hairless, ultra-sexual ape then i would not of had these expectations that you taught me instead.

oh fellow human, you are just a pawn like i am in this silly little world we created for ourselves. money, celebrity, corporations, intercontinental ballistic missiles, lipstick, all queer little notions by a self-centered, insecure little ape who one day realized that he could pick up a stick and use it as a tool.

superficial? all we care about is how someone looks? well yeah that's who we are. before we could talk all we could do to size someone up was to look them over. so we mated based on how the people looked.

just look at how we are sexy, hairless, big breasted animals. when is the last time you saw a big breasted cat? it serves no evolutionary purpose that's why. for some reason though, it attracted human males of old and then this sexual selection left non-large-breasted women out in the cold. the succeeding generations were then to become larger and larger breasted until they were the preferred size.

hairlessness happened the same way. why are our women relatively hairless? because a long time ago men found it pleasing and thus mated with the least hairiest women around. the following generations had less and less hair until here we are today relatively hairless.

it is like how we breed show animals to look a certain way. we select the ones with the desired characteristics and then mate them. all dogs used to look like wolves. it was through our breeding of them that made them into the varied breeds that they are today. we mated midget dogs together to get the smaller breeds. pug nosed ones were through breeding of ones with shorter and shorter noses. a lot of inbreeding takes place and is why breed dogs suffer from so many breed specific genetic diseases. but the point is how easy it is to shape how a species looks through sexual selection.

we sexually selected what we look like today based on looks. we are born to be superficial and to be attracted by perceived beauty. it takes conditioning and straying from our instincts to put looks aside when evaluating other people. to keep your jaw from dropping when you see a beautiful person takes practice. your ancestry was based on chasing beauty.

just be careful what you wish for though. if we no longer breed based on looks then we are at our peak in terms of beauty. we will become an uglier and uglier species in terms of looks if beauty is not paramount. maybe we would start to base people's worth on other things then. it is your choice.

pubic hair is made to collect and then give off smell. it is flat because that gives it more surface area in which to give off smell. it is around your pubic region because that is where you secrete an oily odorous substance that collects in the hair. the opposite sex would be attracted to this smell but we in modern society are trained to be more repulsed by body odor. your under arms are nice and stinky too and the hair around there collects it and advertises your smell. shaving the underarm hair or trimming it would reduce the effectiveness of the smell broadcasting. we are supposed to like the smell but in modern society this shaving or trimming technique can be employed to reduce the odor.

just to let you know... you have no private thoughts around me. i know what you think. every thought you are having or had, i also thought about the same thing. of course i never thought about some obscure trinket that only you own but i mean in more general terms than that. every homicidal, perverted, sweet, loving, longing, sad, vengeful, pitiful thought of yours does not belong solely to you. i share it as well.

you are be no means unique and i know that. other people are thinking the same things you are and i am one of them. what sets me apart is that i am aware of our similar thinking. i will read you like a book with large type. and yes this can be used to manipulate people. they are the ones who don't realize that we are so easy to figure out. and that is most of you. if you all knew about our extreme similarity and how predictable we are then you wouldn't be so manipulatable.

you have to be empathetic and put yourself in another's shoes. how would you react? what would be your next thought? you obviously have to study yourself in order to answer these questions. this is another area where i have an advantage because i have studied my own thoughts and reactions more so than the average person. because i know what i would do or think i can use that to figure out what you would do or think.

you also should study human interactions in general and pay attention to people and what they say and do. you will see definite patterns and then apply them to figure out what people will do. study humans like they are a specimen. animal watchers know all about animal behaviors and humans can be just as easily figured out.

i don't think hate is strong enough to describe what i feel about you humans. it's so strong because we are in a relationship with one another. you have the potential to hate those closest to you more because of the intimacy involved. and all you ever do, humans, is give me grief.

i was born a sweet little baby like any other. so why hate me so much more? it seems you wanted me destroyed before i could live out some prophecy that would culminate in your destruction. you have been my wicked queen always watching and waiting for any opportunity to poison my apple. you told me that i should have wonderful things and a happy existence but then you gave me no opportunity. you built me up just so you could pull the chair out as i tried to sit down.

why do you torment me? why not just tell me from the beginning how it is really going to work. why the charade? less than one percent of the people on the planet lead lives based on what you say our lives will be like. why not be honest? is it that you love to punish and to torture?

damn if some alien race isn't gonna whoop ass all over you. oh and keep trying to contact them. yeah that's a good idea. yeah even though every "discovery" of a less technologically advanced group by a more advanced group in all of human history has led to the enslavement and/or destruction of that "primitive" group. yeah hope this one's the exception. you muther f'ers.

am i done? have i given up all hope for your salvation? pretty much. bitter? you damn jif i am. i found out everything you told me is a lie. now what? continue on like it's really the truth? would you? i can't and i won't. if the loves not there then it will only get worse. i think you humans should leave. you've done enough already. out!! yet for some reason i feel i need you. you and i... we're not that much different. i mean hey we both breathe air right? two eyes and a nose? me too!! boy look at all we have in common. i mean maybe i was a bit harsh back there? now i don't know if i'm crazy or not but gee i think there might still be a little something between us. i mean maybe we could even have lunch sometime and just talk. you know, how we used to. NOT!! you dumb F!! now get the hell out!!

yeah that's just how it'll go. damn dirty apes.

Dearest humans,
<insert angry sentiments here>

    With utmost sincerity,
    a fellow human

at about day 14 in your menstrual cycle you become fertile (day 1 would be the first bleeding day). you have a lot more mucous than usual. you become very sexual because this is your fertile time and you subconsciously dress appropriately i.e. more makeup, jewelry, revealing clothing, etc. just take notice and you will see this is true.

and remember, just because you are fertile for only a day or two, doesn't mean much because you can't be absolutely sure when it is. although studying mucous viscosity, temperature, and calendar patterns can put you in the ballpark. but mucous can hold sperm in for a few days and send it on up on the fertile one.

p.m.s. is a reality. some deny its existence but it can be easily seen if one's menstrual cycle is charted. it's affects vary though but watch out for moodiness. try and talk yourself down and remind yourself that it is purely hormonal.